Funeral Jokes


Funeral Jokes

Here are some funny jokes to ease the pain of a funeral: Q: What do you call a fake noodle? A: An Impasta Q: Want to hear a construction joke? A: Oh never mind, I'm still working on that one. Q: Why don't ghosts like parties? A: They prefer hauntings! Q: Why did the gym close down? A: It just didn't work out! Q: You know what I saw today?


Your Funeral Joke Pinoy Jokes 2023

High Five As the judge sentenced me to death, I tried to offer him a high five. But he left me hanging. Death Row Prisoner A death row prisoner was told how he was going to be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked. Ironic Death My aunt's star sign was cancer, so it's pretty ironic how she died. She was eaten by a giant crab. Proud Dad


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Whose funeral is it?" "My husband's." "What happened to him?" The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him." She inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?" The woman answered,.


Pin by Melissa Stonecipher on Quotable Quotes Funny quotes, True quotes, Inspirational quotes

Funeral Jokes 39. Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral. 38. Q: Why are there only two paulbears at a black guys funeral? A: There are only two handles on a garbage can. 37. Where would you take Stephen hawking if he dies, the funeral directors or PC world 36. The mother was later killed in her sleep because her son hates puns.


100 Best Funeral Jokes in 2020 Funeral jokes, Jokes, Hilarious

Grim Reaper When I die, I want someone to dress as the Grim Reaper and stand in front of the casket without saying a word to anyone. Smokin' hot Being cremated is my last hope for a smokin' hot body. I put the fun in fun eral You can't spell funeral without fun. One day closer… As soon as you're born you start dying.


Fish funerals Gary Larson, The Far Side, Funeral, Siding, Jokes, Cartoon, Humor, Fish, Funny

1. Any day above ground is a good one. You may not get a laugh out of everyone on this one-liner. Still, I've heard this line out of the mouth of people who aren't funeral directors, and it still gets quite a guffaw. That said, this is a one-liner that can get old pretty quick. 2. You look good. Like open-casket good.


31 MorbidButFunny Funeral Jokes & OneLiners » Urns Online

The best funeral jokes A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again.


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Hilarious Funeral Jokes curated just for you, like: How do the Irish cure a hangover? With a funeral.


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47 Hilarious Funeral Puns - Punstoppable 🛑 A list of puns related to "Funeral" (At bosses funeral kneeling and whispering at coffin) "Who's thinking outside the box now Gary?" 👍︎ 💬︎ 👤︎ 📅︎ 🚨︎ I was at a friends funeral and I said to the widow "do you mind if I say a word?" She said go ahead. I stood up said "plethora" and sat back down.


Pin by Premier Funeral Services on Funeral Humor Funny cartoon pictures, Cartoon jokes, Funny

1. This funeral is a grave affair. Here, the pun is the meaning of the word "grave," which usually means serious. In this context, it refers to the burial of a body in a grave. If you're crafting a funny eulogy for someone who liked to joke around, then adding this and other funny eulogy quotes might be appropriate. 2.


Pin by Kissy on Humor Memes, Hilarious, Funeral

Except at a funeral. Knock, knock. (Who is there?) Grandma! Grandma wh-, Hoy Shit Stop The Funeral! Heard about the guy who created cough drops that died last week? There'll be no coffin at his funeral. What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? There's one less drunk at the funeral.


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1. "Death is too negative for me. So I'll be popping off for a long cup of tea, Do splash out on two bags in the pot. And for my god's sake, keep the water hot." — Michael Ashby If you're unsure how to begin a eulogy, why not start with the opening of a funny funeral poem?


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Posted in Funeral Jokes, Funny Stories, Life Jokes, Work Jokes. Funeral Parlor Joke. I was a little taken aback when I got my receipt from the funeral parlor, on the bottom of the receipt, after the bill, it read, "Thank you. Please come again."


Pin by Hugo Jerez Jr. on Medium Quality Memes Death humor, Cartoon jokes, Dark humor jokes

Mourning wood. This joke may contain profanity. 🤔 I am over 18 What is something you can say at both a funeral and during sex? I'm sorry, were you close? When I was about 9 years old, my father forced me to go with him to the funeral of a friend of his, that I didn't know. When we got there, I stayed in a corner, waiting for time to pass by.


Pin by Sheena Pousson on Mortician Aesthetic Cartoon jokes, Funny cartoons, Bizarro comic

1. "Why did the hearse driver cross the road? To get to the other side…of the cemetery." 2. Why did the ghost attend the funeral? He wanted to see if it was to dye for." 3. "Why don't morticians work on the weekends? They're off the corpse." 4. "What do you call a fake funeral? A sham-burial." 5.


Pin by Premier Funeral Services on Funeral Humor Morbid humor, Funny cartoon, Old quotes

Some funny eulogy quotes include: "One of the hardest things I've ever had to do was say goodbye to you, your kindness, your love, and your amazing fart jokes." "No one could pull off leopard print like (insert deceased individual's name). I mean if she (he) were here today, she'd (he'd) be rocking an aggressively leopard look head to toe and.